To have and to hold…for 72 days.

The fit for television romance of Kim Kardashian and Kris Hump-what’s-his-name, has ended.

Although the marriage was destined to end, I was surprised at how soon it did.

Everyone, from her sisters to the lady at the local pharmacy counter, knew this would not be a very long marriage.

It was obvious from Keeping Up with the Kardashians that Hump-what’s-his-name, was not a very good fit for the family.

First, Hump-what’s-his-name, is not made for television. His sense of humor is dry, he tells corny jokes, and instead of being funny, he’s a little mean at times.

Second, Hump-what’s-his-name was never inducted into the Kardashian Klan.

In order to be accepted, one must put up with Khloe’s antics. She’s not being mean, she’s making sure you can accept and handle the Kardashian lifestyle.

Episodes from their reality show proved Humpy couldn’t handle the wrath of Khloe.

Third, his name should have been a good enough reason to not marry him.

Kardashian is not just a last name, it’s a brand.

From shoes and clothes to cologne, Kardashian is internationally known.

Also, who marries a woman who has the same first name as his mother?

Kim Kardashian is a hardworking, driven, and  beautiful woman who is working hard to move past her sex tape days.

As a loyal fan of Kim, I feel it’s only fitting I give her advice during her hardship.

Dear Kim,

Although this is a very difficult time in your life, don’t take the time to mourn. Instead, begin thinking about how this can be turned into a new E! spin-off reality show.

It will make your fans happy to see how you’re handling this situation and it will bring in a lot of money for you and for the E! network.

If you are still looking for love, look for someone who has a more famous last name than you. Kennedy, Pitt, or Schwarzenegger should do the trick.  If you’re having a hard time finding the perfect guy, let your family hook you up with a blind date.

After all, if they don’t approve, there is no chance he will be admitted into the Kardashian Klan anyway!

Hope this helps!

Love,

Anastasia Reed

XOXO